


From the Ashes Arise

by AnnaStachia



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Gen, One Sided Attraction, SPOILERS for TLJ, Unhealthy Obsession, does kylo ren count as a warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-25
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-02-20 12:12:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13146456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnaStachia/pseuds/AnnaStachia
Summary: Spoilers for TLJ!He’d never realized it before, never let himself think about it. But there, trapped in Snoke’s throne room, surrounded by enemies, she was angry, defiant, knowing that only death awaited her. She was beautiful.-What went through Kylo Ren's head during the scene in Snoke's throne room  and how it played out.





	From the Ashes Arise

She was beautiful.

He’d never realized it before, never let himself think about it. But there, trapped in Snoke’s throne room, surrounded by enemies, she was angry, defiant, knowing that only death awaited her. She was beautiful. 

His vision made sense in a whole new way and her’s too. The force wasn’t trying to show them that they were going to turn each other, the force was trying to show them they were meant to be together. Light and Dark, two sides of life. Balance. He and Rey were balance. That had to be it. It’s the only thing that made sense. Rey was too stubborn to turn, and he was too far gone. But if they could create balance then…

Then they could create something new. Something the galaxy had never seen before. 

Everything else was insignificant. The rebellion, Luke Skywalker, Snoke, the First Order, even his long held goals of surpassing his grandfather. This was what he was meant to do, create something new, something amazing with Rey.

And she was going to die right here. The realization turned his stomach, as he watched Snoke torture her mind. He needed to do something, to save her, but Snoke would then turn on him. As much as he hated it, Snoke was far more powerful than he was. If he was going to get her out of here, get them out of here, he had to be smart about it. 

There it was, that little bit of luck he always seemed to find when he needed it most. The girl’s lightsaber, on the arm of Snoke’s throne. How careless. But he wouldn’t be. He would have to wait for just the right moment or Snoke would notice. 

The rebellion was being wiped out, then the First Order would die. The galaxy would be needing something new, and they would shepard it in. They would show the people a new way of life, balance. But first it all had to die. 

Well first, he needed to save her, or there was nothing. 

And then Snoke provided him with the perfect opportunity. Snoke was going to make him kill the girl.

He hated the look in her eyes as she came face to face with him once more. The pleading look of hope. It was reminiscent of his father right before he died. The vague notion that maybe he wasn’t as bad, as far gone, as they feared. Now he knew it wasn’t important. His father had been wrong, and he had killed him. There was no coming back from that. And he would have killed Rey if not for this epiphany. 

But he needed her. They needed each other. Not the last of their kind, but the first. They were something new, and they would build something new. 

He kept his eyes on her, hoping that she might read his thoughts. Perhaps he would have to teach her that trick, though maybe it was one he would keep to himself. He couldn’t look away from her, though, or Snokes would know. 

The lightsaber didn’t call to him like he thought it would. There was no sense of belonging as he connected to it with the force. It felt hollow, but just another sign that this was the right thing. The past needed to die.

What he never expected was how easy it would be. He’d always thought that if he ever faced down Snoke it would be a battle of epic proportions, even if he’d gotten the drop on him. But really, it was just as simple as slicing butter. Like killing anyone else. One minute Snoke was practically salivating at the destruction of the rebels and the death of the last jedi, and the next his top half was on the floor.

Then there was a moment of nothing. No one moved, no one said anything. In that moment he felt nothing. No sense of great triumph, no sense of remorse. Just nothing. 

The moment ended and reality crashed back in, and he felt relief. This had been the right thing. This was what he meant to do. Rebirth can only come from destruction. He was pretty sure there was some ancient jedi text like that somewhere. 

As the moment ended Snoke’s guards took action and so did they. This time they weren’t fighting each other, but with each other. It felt right. They were always meant to be together, side by side, back to back. Light and dark. Balance. 

The fight isn’t easy, especially for her after everything she just went through, but they manage to put the guards down. Then it’s just the two of them, as it ought to be. Glancing around at all the dead bodies, he knew this was just the beginning. The rebellion was dying and with it his entire legacy. With it, the future she tried to make for herself, but that was the wrong future. The rebellion needed to die. So did the First Order. He wasn’t his grandfather, and he knew that now. He was meant to be so much more, something new, something better. 

“Order them to stop the attack.”

Her words almost made his heart sink, but of course she just didn’t realize it yet. She was still full of hope, full of light. It was all just channeled in the wrong direction. She didn’t realize that they have a grander destiny laid out before them, and he needed to make her see it. That was all. Of course she would see it, the balance they could create with the two of them. How great they could be. 

She just needed to let the past die, to let it all go and start anew, just like him. He killed his mentor for her, and Snoke wouldn’t be the first or last to fall to this new world order they would create. The jedi, the sith, the rebellion, her teacher his old one, his…. His mother. Destroy it all and start from scratch. 

She had been holding out false hope that her own parents would come back for her one day, but they both knew that to be a fantasy. He just had to remind her that there was nothing to go back to. The only way to go was forward. With him. This was what she was meant to do. The could let it all go and rebuild it into something new, a new world order, with the two of them at the top. Balance. 

All she had to do was take his hand. It wouldn’t be easy, he knew. They would probably fight along the way, but as long as they were together it wouldn’t matter. They could work things out. A balance. But she had to take that step. She had to let the past die, to let it all go. To take that leap of faith and trust that this was the best course of action. That he would take care of her. 

He watched as she slowly lifted her hand, holding it towards him. The uncertainty in her features turned to resolve in a split second and his world shattered around him. 

He considered himself lucky her grasp of the force was still tenuous. He’s had years of training, and she’s just had a few weeks. Still she was strong, stronger than he’d given her credit for. 

If this was her decision, so be it. She didn’t even want to try and understand what he was trying to do. Just like the rest of them. Just like everyone in his whole life, she didn’t want to listen to him. Everyone thought they knew what was best for Kylo Ren, for Ben Solo, but no one wanted to hear what he thought was best. So why not just get rid of him. Send him to his uncle, murder him in his sleep, walk away from him when he offered the galaxy on the platter. 

It turned out that Rey was just like everyone else. And just like everyone else she would turn her back on him. She didn’t even want to hear what he had to offer, because in her mind he was always a monster. Either it was her way or no way. Just like his parents, and just like the jedi. Our way or none.

She would die like the rest of them. They could have created a world of balance, something new. It would have been beautiful. Now that dream was crumbling, and he would create his own world. A world of terror and darkness. He would make sure she lived just long enough to see what she had done to the galaxy. He would make sure she knew that his reign of terror was her fault. He would be sure that she watched all the people she cared about die. Then maybe he would kill her. 

Their hold over the lightsaber seemed to be even, neither one of them gave the other an inch, and poured all their power into it. Unable to keep up the game of tug-o-war the force exploded outward on each of them. 

The last thing he saw was her flying backwards and the his grandfather’s lightsaber being torn apart. Then his head struck metal and he knew blackness.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed! I really liked the TLJ, and especially a lot of the stuff it gave us to work with. 
> 
>  
> 
> If you enjoy my work please consider [Buying Me a Coffee](https://ko-fi.com/E1E56HSK). Thank you!


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